Little bit of Blah-De-Blah in my life...

Wow. So many of my posts start this same way. I feel the urge to blog but the moment I sit down to squeeze one out I get nothing. So I sit here. I procrastinate. I only have one other reader that comments on my blog so I read her blog and try to make a comment that doesn’t start with “Awww” or “You go girl” or something that the other 40 commentators started their posts with. She seems pretty cool. Losin’ It just the right amount to ensure that she’s no more fucked up than the rest of us whilst not losing touch with reality. Actually her life reminds me a bit of our life. She is a business woman just like my wife. Her husband seems to worship her enough to be allowed to still sleep in the master bedroom. Anyways see that for yourself right…here.

As for my blog. Yeah I still got nothin’. I sat down a few nights ago and started to post. I had a massive lot of stuff written before I sat back and realised I was just writing a whole heap of ‘poor me’ crap. So I ditched it and went to bed. Felt much better in the morning even if I did wake up on the very edge of the bed while the boy slept sideways between his Mum and I.

Work still sucks, but until someone knocks on my door and pays me to play playstation eight hours a day my job will always suck. I still haven’t had a single bit of interest from my web design site. I guess it doesn’t help that I haven’t marketed it at all. I don’t really have the time for it at this moment anyways. My wife’s site needs another overhaul. Hasn’t been done since New Years and there’s a heap of old information on there.

On the lighter side I got my dog bathed and my lawn mowed this week. BONUS! It’s another sixty bucks I could have saved by doing it myself, but right now it’s money well spent. The dog bathing chick is pretty good. She rubs this shit on her (the dog that is. I have to pay extra to see her rub stuff on herself) which makes her smell good for days after. And she’s soft and I don’t worry so much about her rubbing up against the boy. (AGAIN I am talking about the DOG…sheesh!).

We got the car by the way. Holden Captiva. I always promised myself I wouldn’t get involved in the whole ‘Holden vs. Ford’ bullshit but my boss drives a Ford so it just happened naturally. I have a dig once in a while. Just not often enough for her to think to have a dig back at me when the opportunity arises. I have never and will never understand peoples’ obsession with cars. As long as it gets me from A to B and I can play my music in it I am happy. Specially if you’re the only one in there and you can crank it up loud.

It’s like that girl on the ad. I think it’s a lottery ad or something where it says “Sing...like nobody’s listening” and it’s got some young chicky bopping away in her little steel chariot. I am that girl. Only a hell of a lot uglier and hairier. When I am in the car I sing and HOPE that nobody’s listening. For their sakes. Cos I can’t sing for shit. Correction. I CAN sing. It just SOUNDS like shit.

You see my wife has never taken any interest in any of my playstation games. But I hired out one of the Singstar ones and she’s rapt. So am I. Problem is after playing it I realised that I sing really…REALLY bad. My wife’s good though. I kinda always knew she was cos I have heard her sing along quietly to her fav songs. So now I find myself sitting back and watching her play my playstation. Quite an amusing role reversal. Next thing you know I will be scrapbooking. Fahgedaboudit!

Seriously though, it’s very cool that I have found a game that we can both enjoy together and even the boy gets in and has a go. He sings better than me too and he can still barely speak English. I don’t have the balls to let the dog in on the act. That would be way too big a blow to the ego. She’d proly end up uploading her stuff online and next thing you know my inbox is swamped with people wanting to meet her. Well unless you’re coming around to take her for a walk you can all get fucked!

As you can see I am not overly perturbed by my lack of vocal talent. Truth is I am devastated. I want to be famous. I want to stand up in front of seventy thousand people and have them at my beck and call. Anyways not gonna happen. Although now I think about it, Chopper Reid couldn’t sing either and he has a massive fan base. If I want my picture took maybe I could rob a bank or mame some poor sod. I would end up on the front page of newspapers and all over the television. Imagine how many teenage followers I would have who all want to be just like me. Fuckin’ losers. Man I fear for the future.

Nah you can forget about that idea too. I am destined to live a very long…very normal life. Not too many ups and not too many downs and when I die and fade away to nothing I won’t have left too dark a stain on society. As long as I have my family and my handful of friends I should be able to leave this world with a smile on my face. And if I suffocate from the smell of my own farts then I KNOW my life will have been worth living right down to my last breath.